Recently I was on the subway. There was a beautiful young girl, who was wearing tall black-and-white striped socks like she had just stepped out of a Tim Burton movie or finished up her shift at Hot Topic. She had her head down and was reading her worn paperback. Since I am a total wimp and a total ooey gooey romantic, I thought about pulling out an index card (fun fact: my “organizational style” involves a series of color-coded index cards and stick-it notes only decipherable to me and whoever the guy was that Russell Crowe played in “A Beautiful Mind”) and writing her a note.
“You are one of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen riding the subway,” the note would have read. (It would have been on the magenta card, the one with the blue backing.) “If you would want to call me, please do so. My number follows. If you have no interest, then at least you can use this card as a bookmark, and tell everybody you know how the shy guy on the train thought you were beautiful. I appreciate that you didn’t take a taxi.”
But I didn’t give this girl with the Cheshire Cat socks the card. This partially had to do with the aforementioned wimpiness, but the missed connection also happened because we both had our headphones on (she had the inner-ear variety; I had the Ibiza-DJ-style Bose models). What if I had given her that card? It would have been followed by a lot of flirting punctuated by me clumsily trying to arrange a date, possibly at the Olive Garden in Time Square. (Never underestimate the raw romantic power of the never-ending soup and salad bowl!) Headphones have become the commuting equivalent of the loud guy at the bar who wants to talk to you about the totally awesome Dave Matthews Band show he went to last week. They impede communication, flirtation and genuine human interaction. We’re so disconnected as it is, I say – if you’re around other humans and have your headphones on to drown out the bellowing child sitting next to you on the Metro North – unplug, listen and chat.
I understand that I’m an awful offender. I commute from suburban Connecticut, which involves an hour and fifteen minute train ride plus wherever the fuck I’m headed in New York City. Plus, I’m a music junkie, and see that time as an opportunity to listen to the new Muse album and gauge whether or not it’s complete shit (it is). Lately, too, I’ve had work piling up so that commute is essential to getting shit done — transcribing interviews or watching screeners or generally trying to get a handle on my life, using (again) a series of helpfully color-coded index cards.
But I wonder what would happen if I wasn’t listening to histrionic British pop rock and instead was listening to what was going on around me. I imagine it would be pretty inspiring. When I used to go out to dinner with the (now) ex-girlfriend, she would drop out of the conversation. We would then listen, intently, to the neighboring tables. “Tell me what they do for a living?” she would ask me. Or: “What do you think the relationship is between the young Indian girl and that older white man?” I would then put on my best (metaphoric) deerstalker hat and explain that the guy is a construction worker but wants to leave to work on his long-planned romance novel, while the relationship between the young Indian girl and the older white man is purely transactional.
If you want to be a writer, as SOME of you do, you have to listen to the speech patterns of other people, not just your own. It IS essential to have other voices in your head. And I’m not talking about the Leonardo DiCaprio-at-the-end-of-”Shutter Island” way, but other dialects, dictions, and idioms that only come from real life, honest-to-god human beings and not from what your imagination thinks other people sound like.
When Apple introduced a newly improved “ear bud” (renamed the “ear pod”), I cursed the computer screen, both because I have mild tourettes and because they were giving people another, super-efficient way to wall off interaction on the subway and sidewalks.
And it’s not just flirty interactions that I crave on the train. A couple of months ago there was a guy reading “11/22/63,” the jaw-droppingly brilliant Stephen King novel about a school teacher who goes back in time to try and prevent the Kennedy assassination (he gets more than he bargained for, of course, including but not limited to a sort-of friendship with Lee Harvey Oswald). I wanted to talk to the guy who was reading it and ask him where he was and if he had a similar experience, where I was in a Five Guys for lunch and almost started crying into my Cajun-style fries. But I couldn’t. Because I had my headphones on. It would have required me to turn off my headphones (yes, they’re battery-powered) and pull them off my ears and have a conversation. Which is a lot to ask. Plus I didn’t want to waste an index card.
Everyone loves what you guys tend to be up too. This sort
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{
{I have|I’ve} been {surfing|browsing} online more than {three|3|2|4} hours today, yet I never found any
interesting article like yours. {It’s|It is} pretty worth enough for me.
{In my opinion|Personally|In my view}, if all {webmasters|site owners|website owners|web owners} and bloggers made good content as you did,
the {internet|net|web} will be {much more|a lot more}
useful than ever before.|
I {couldn’t|could not} {resist|refrain from} commenting.
{Very well|Perfectly|Well|Exceptionally well} written!|
{I will|I’ll} {right away|immediately} {take hold of|grab|clutch|grasp|seize|snatch} your {rss|rss
feed} as I {can not|can’t} {in finding|find|to find} your {email|e-mail} subscription {link|hyperlink} or {newsletter|e-newsletter} service.
Do {you have|you’ve} any? {Please|Kindly} {allow|permit|let} me {realize|recognize|understand|recognise|know} {so that|in order that} I {may just|may|could} subscribe.
Thanks.|
{It is|It’s} {appropriate|perfect|the best} time to make some plans for the
future and {it is|it’s} time to be happy. {I have|I’ve} read this post and if I could I {want to|wish to|desire to} suggest you {few|some} interesting things
or {advice|suggestions|tips}. {Perhaps|Maybe} you {could|can} write next articles referring to this article.
I {want to|wish to|desire to} read {more|even more} things about it!|
{It is|It’s} {appropriate|perfect|the best} time to make
{a few|some} plans for {the future|the longer term|the long run}
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or {advice|suggestions|tips}. {Perhaps|Maybe} you
{could|can} write {next|subsequent} articles {relating to|referring to|regarding} this article.
I {want to|wish to|desire to} {read|learn} {more|even more} {things|issues}
{approximately|about} it!|
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days|nowadays|today|lately|as of late}, {yet|but} I {never|by
no means} {found|discovered} any {interesting|fascinating|attention-grabbing} article like yours.
{It’s|It is} {lovely|pretty|beautiful} {worth|value|price} {enough|sufficient} for me.
{In my opinion|Personally|In my view}, if all {webmasters|site
owners|website owners|web owners} and bloggers made {just right|good|excellent} {content|content material} as {you did|you probably did}, the {internet|net|web} {will
be|shall be|might be|will probably be|can be|will likely be} {much more|a lot more} {useful|helpful} than ever before.|
Ahaa, its {nice|pleasant|good|fastidious} {discussion|conversation|dialogue} {regarding|concerning|about|on the topic of} this {article|post|piece of writing|paragraph} {here|at this place} at this {blog|weblog|webpage|website|web site}, I have read all that, so {now|at this time} me
also commenting {here|at this place}.|
I am sure this {article|post|piece of writing|paragraph} has touched all
the internet {users|people|viewers|visitors}, its really really {nice|pleasant|good|fastidious} {article|post|piece of writing|paragraph} on building up new
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Wow, this {article|post|piece of writing|paragraph} is {nice|pleasant|good|fastidious}, my {sister|younger sister} is analyzing {such|these|these kinds of} things, {so|thus|therefore} I am going to {tell|inform|let know|convey}
her.|
{Saved as a favorite|bookmarked!!}, {I really like|I like|I love} {your blog|your
site|your web site|your website}!|
Way cool! Some {very|extremely} valid points!
I appreciate you {writing this|penning this} {article|post|write-up} {and
the|and also the|plus the} rest of the {site is|website is} {also very|extremely|very|also
really|really} good.|
Hi, {I do believe|I do think} {this is an excellent|this is a great} {blog|website|web
site|site}. I stumbledupon it 😉 {I will|I am going to|I’m going to|I may}
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Money and freedom {is the best|is the greatest} way to change, may you be rich and continue
to {help|guide} {other people|others}.|
Woah! I’m really {loving|enjoying|digging} the template/theme of this {site|website|blog}.
It’s simple, yet effective. A lot of times it’s {very hard|very difficult|challenging|tough|difficult|hard} to get that “perfect balance” between {superb usability|user friendliness|usability} and {visual appearance|visual appeal|appearance}.
I must say {that you’ve|you have|you’ve} done
a {awesome|amazing|very good|superb|fantastic|excellent|great} job with
this. {In addition|Additionally|Also}, the blog loads {very|extremely|super} {fast|quick} for me
on {Safari|Internet explorer|Chrome|Opera|Firefox}. {Superb|Exceptional|Outstanding|Excellent} Blog!|
These are {really|actually|in fact|truly|genuinely} {great|enormous|impressive|wonderful|fantastic} ideas
in {regarding|concerning|about|on the topic of} blogging. You have touched some {nice|pleasant|good|fastidious} {points|factors|things} here.
Any way keep up wrinting.|
{I love|I really like|I enjoy|I like|Everyone loves} what you guys {are|are usually|tend to be}
up too. {This sort of|This type of|Such|This kind of} clever work and {exposure|coverage|reporting}!
Keep up the {superb|terrific|very good|great|good|awesome|fantastic|excellent|amazing|wonderful} works guys I’ve {incorporated||added|included} you guys to {|my|our||my personal|my own} blogroll.|
{Howdy|Hi there|Hey there|Hi|Hello|Hey}! Someone in my
{Myspace|Facebook} group shared this {site|website} with
us so I came to {give it a look|look it over|take a look|check
it out}. I’m definitely {enjoying|loving} the information. I’m {book-marking|bookmarking} and will be tweeting this to my followers!
{Terrific|Wonderful|Great|Fantastic|Outstanding|Exceptional|Superb|Excellent} blog and {wonderful|terrific|brilliant|amazing|great|excellent|fantastic|outstanding|superb}
{style and design|design and style|design}.|
{I love|I really like|I enjoy|I like|Everyone loves} what you guys {are|are usually|tend to be} up too.
{This sort of|This type of|Such|This kind of}
clever work and {exposure|coverage|reporting}! Keep up the {superb|terrific|very good|great|good|awesome|fantastic|excellent|amazing|wonderful} works guys I’ve {incorporated|added|included} you guys to {|my|our|my personal|my own} blogroll.|
{Howdy|Hi there|Hey there|Hi|Hello|Hey} would you mind {stating|sharing} which blog platform you’re {working with|using}?
I’m {looking|planning|going} to start my own blog
{in the near future|soon} but I’m having a {tough|difficult|hard} time {making a decision|selecting|choosing|deciding}
between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal.
The reason I ask is because your {design and style|design|layout} seems different then most
blogs and I’m looking for something {completely unique|unique}.
P.S {My apologies|Apologies|Sorry} for {getting|being} off-topic
but I had to ask!|
{Howdy|Hi there|Hi|Hey there|Hello|Hey} would you mind letting me know which {webhost|hosting company|web host} you’re {utilizing|working with|using}?
I’ve loaded your blog in 3 {completely different|different} {internet
browsers|web browsers|browsers} and I must say this blog loads a lot {quicker|faster} then most.
Can you {suggest|recommend} a good {internet hosting|web hosting|hosting} provider at a {honest|reasonable|fair} price?
{Thanks a lot|Kudos|Cheers|Thank you|Many thanks|Thanks},
I appreciate it!|
{I love|I really like|I like|Everyone loves} it {when people|when individuals|when folks|whenever
people} {come together|get together} and share {opinions|thoughts|views|ideas}.
Great {blog|website|site}, {keep it up|continue the good work|stick with
it}!|
Thank you for the {auspicious|good} writeup.
It in fact was a amusement account it. Look advanced to {far|more} added agreeable from
you! {By the way|However}, how {can|could} we communicate?|
{Howdy|Hi there|Hey there|Hello|Hey} just
wanted to give you a quick heads up. The {text|words} in your {content|post|article} seem to
be running off the screen in {Ie|Internet explorer|Chrome|Firefox|Safari|Opera}.
I’m not sure if this is a {format|formatting} issue
or something to do with {web browser|internet browser|browser}
compatibility but I {thought|figured} I’d post to let you know.
The {style and design|design and style|layout|design} look great though!
Hope you get the {problem|issue} {solved|resolved|fixed} soon. {Kudos|Cheers|Many thanks|Thanks}|
This is a topic {that is|that’s|which is} {close to|near to} my heart…
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{Where|Exactly where} are your contact details though?|
It’s very {easy|simple|trouble-free|straightforward|effortless} to find out any
{topic|matter} on {net|web} as compared to {books|textbooks}, as I found this {article|post|piece of writing|paragraph} at
this {website|web site|site|web page}.|
Does your {site|website|blog} have a contact page? I’m having {a tough time|problems|trouble} locating it but,
I’d like to {send|shoot} you an {e-mail|email}. I’ve got some {creative ideas|recommendations|suggestions|ideas} for your blog you might be interested in hearing.
Either way, great {site|website|blog} and I look forward to seeing it
{develop|improve|expand|grow} over time.|
{Hola|Hey there|Hi|Hello|Greetings}! I’ve been {following|reading}
your {site|web site|website|weblog|blog} for {a long
time|a while|some time} now and finally got the {bravery|courage} to go ahead and give you a shout out from {New
Caney|Kingwood|Huffman|Porter|Houston|Dallas|Austin|Lubbock|Humble|Atascocita} {Tx|Texas}!
Just wanted to {tell you|mention|say} keep
up the {fantastic|excellent|great|good} {job|work}!|
Greetings from {Idaho|Carolina|Ohio|Colorado|Florida|Los angeles|California}!
I’m {bored to tears|bored to death|bored} at work so I decided to {check out|browse} your {site|website|blog} on my iphone
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Its {like you|such as you} {read|learn} my {mind|thoughts}!
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{I think|I feel|I believe} {that you|that you simply|that you just}
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{force|pressure|drive|power} the message {house|home} {a bit|a little bit},
{however|but} {other than|instead of} that, {this is|that is}
{great|wonderful|fantastic|magnificent|excellent} blog.
{A great|An excellent|A fantastic} read. {I’ll|I will} {definitely|certainly} be back.|
I visited {multiple|many|several|various} {websites|sites|web sites|web pages|blogs} {but|except|however} the audio {quality|feature} for audio songs {current|present|existing} at this {website|web
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{Howdy|Hi there|Hi|Hello}, i read your blog {occasionally|from time to time} and i own a similar one
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If so how do you {prevent|reduce|stop|protect against} it, any plugin or anything you can {advise|suggest|recommend}?
I get so much lately it’s driving me {mad|insane|crazy} so any {assistance|help|support} is very much appreciated.|
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{It is the|It’s the} little changes {that make|which will make|that produce|that will
make} {the biggest|the largest|the greatest|the most
important|the most significant} changes. {Thanks
a lot|Thanks|Many thanks} for sharing!|
{I really|I truly|I seriously|I absolutely} love {your
blog|your site|your website}.. {Very nice|Excellent|Pleasant|Great} colors & theme.
Did you {create|develop|make|build} {this website|this site|this web site|this amazing site} yourself?
Please reply back as I’m {looking to|trying to|planning to|wanting to|hoping to|attempting to} create {my own|my very own|my own personal} {blog|website|site} and {would like to|want to|would love to} {know|learn|find out} where you got
this from or {what the|exactly what the|just what the} theme
{is called|is named}. {Thanks|Many thanks|Thank you|Cheers|Appreciate it|Kudos}!|
{Hi there|Hello there|Howdy}! This {post|article|blog post} {couldn’t|could not} be written {any better|much better}!
{Reading through|Looking at|Going through|Looking through} this {post|article} reminds me of my
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{I will|I’ll|I am going to|I most certainly will} {forward|send} {this article|this information|this
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going to} {have a good|have a very good|have a great} read.
{Thank you for|Thanks for|Many thanks for|I appreciate you for} sharing!|
{Wow|Whoa|Incredible|Amazing}! This blog looks {exactly|just} like my old one!
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choice of colors!|
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Your {story-telling|writing|humoristic} style is {awesome|witty}, keep {doing what you’re doing|up the good work|it up}!|
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{I have|I’ve got|I have got} you {bookmarked|book marked|book-marked|saved as a favorite} {to check
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It was {inspiring|funny|practical|helpful}.
Keep on posting!|
{Hi there|Hello}, I enjoy reading {all of|through} your {article|post|article
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I {always|for all time|all the time|constantly|every time} emailed
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{because|since|as|for the reason that} if like to read it {then|after that|next|afterward} my {friends|links|contacts} will too.|
My {coder|programmer|developer} is trying to {persuade|convince} me to
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{content|posts} into it? {Any kind of|Any} help would be {really|greatly} appreciated!|
{Hello|Hi|Hello there|Hi there|Howdy|Good day}!
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{Anyways|Anyhow|Nonetheless|Regardless},
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{Terrific|Great|Wonderful} {article|work}!
{This is|That is} {the type of|the kind of} {information|info} {that
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{Disgrace|Shame} on {the {seek|search} engines|Google} for {now not|not|no longer} positioning this {post|submit|publish|put up}
{upper|higher}! Come on over and {talk over with|discuss with|seek advice from|visit|consult with} my {site|web site|website}
. {Thank you|Thanks} =)|
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I hope to give something back and {help|aid} others like you {helped|aided} me.|
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{A person|Someone|Somebody} {necessarily|essentially} {lend a hand|help|assist} to make {seriously|critically|significantly|severely} {articles|posts} {I would|I
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{incredible|amazing|extraordinary}. {Great|Wonderful|Fantastic|Magnificent|Excellent} {task|process|activity|job}!|
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I {came across|found} this board and I {in finding|find|to
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{I am hoping|I hope|I’m hoping} {to give|to offer|to provide|to present} {something|one thing} {back|again}
and {help|aid} others {like you|such as you} {helped|aided} me.|
{Hello|Hi|Hello there|Hi there|Howdy|Good day|Hey
there}! {I just|I simply} {would like to|want to|wish to} {give you a|offer you a} {huge|big} thumbs up {for the|for your} {great|excellent} {info|information} {you have|you’ve got|you
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I {always|all the time|every time} used to {read|study} {article|post|piece of writing|paragraph} in news papers but now as I
am a user of {internet|web|net} {so|thus|therefore} from now I am using net for
{articles|posts|articles or reviews|content}, thanks to web.|
Your {way|method|means|mode} of {describing|explaining|telling}
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{all|every one} {can|be able to|be capable of} {easily|without difficulty|effortlessly|simply} {understand|know|be aware of} it, Thanks
a lot.|
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Cheers!|
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a {nice|great} blog like this one {these days|nowadays|today}.|
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Congratulations Elizabeth you missed the point of the whole article! I thought the article was …okay, but winced when I saw your mean-spirited, irrelevant comment.
Or maybe she doesn’t care that you think she’s pretty and didn’t want to be bothered. Why does this kind of thing keep being published??